What Top Celebrities Really Think About Their Bottoms – Special Bionic Edition

Is this actress Michelle Ryan grimacing, as she feels the sting of a wooden hairbrush, splat mercilessly into her soft defenceless buttocks?

bw 06

Well, actually, no. She’s lifting weights in the gym in preparation to star in the new series of the Bionic Woman, the role Lindsay Wagner made famous in the Seventies. The first episode aired in the US last week attracting 14 million viewers.

And she doesn’t have soft defenceless buttocks either:

No, she’s the Bionic Woman… and she’s got BUNS OF STEEL!

Or so she would have us believe, as she describes the rigorous diet and training regime that she has adopted:

I hit the gym for about four hours a day – two hours of personal training and two hours of an Israeli martial arts called Krav Maga. “I also eat more foods like sushi, fish, fruit and vegetables.” I’m getting abs and my buttock muscles are getting stronger and I definitely feel like I’m being much more conscious to eat healthier.

Result : A Bionic Butt!

bw 08

But it wasn’t always thus. Far from it. Michelle used to appear in downbeat British soap Eastenders where she was known for being just a little bit well…on the plump side.

bw 07

Her chunky ankles and sagging behind (see below) were the subject of merciless bitching from fashion gurus and gossip writers, whose sneering comments caused her to have something of a career-threatening breakdown.

bw 05

But it would appear that acquiring a brand new fashionably firm and muscly bottom has helped her to overcome these personal demons. David Eick , a producer on the show, says:

When Michelle came to this role she had a lot of things she wanted to perfect. She looked at it not just as a great opportunity career-wise, but an opportunity to reshape who she was so she could fit into this role as perfectly as possible.

In other words: “Reshape your bottom – Reshape your life”.

bw 09

Her personal trainer should still test those buttocks out with that hairbrush every once in a while though – just to check that they still have sufficient bionic resistance!

Don’t you think?

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s