Ass-vertising

When a bunch of shapely asses paraded outside Grand Central Station to promote a “Booty Call” class at the New York Health and Racquet Club, they began a trend in guerilla advertising which has taken the world by storm. It has even led to the creation of a new word for “derriere media placement” otherwise known as ASS-VERTISING!

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New York 2004

“People were going nuts, as building windows were lined with people in their offices trying to get a glimpse, passers-by stopped to watch the action, and a bunch of news reporters came to have a look.” said a spokesperson.

The idea soon caught on. At a photo convention in the Ukraine, a long legged model was paid to walk around in a mini skirt and deliberately drop pencils. On bending down to pick them up, the Kodak logo was revealed on her white panties. The theory of course is that blogs and internet sites would use the pics, and provide lots of free exposure for the company.

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Kiev 2005

Russian tyre manufacturers jumped on the bandwagon:

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And so did booty loving Italians, along with a funny press release from phone company MTN, which may well have been translated by Google:

It was MTN Company, a brave and innovative integrated communication agency of South Italy, to realize about the great potentials of the bottom as advertising media.

The agency has taken advantage of the ass of fascinating models to promote itself and its creative minds, and to launch the new company website.

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Models have been walking around Italian towns, attracting people’s gaze not only by their body appearance. In fact girls have rising their skirt more than once, showing their bottom and white panties with MTN logo.

The ass-vertising has been used within a wider re-positioning campaign, characterized by the integrated use of traditional and non-traditional communication media,

The operation has given excellent results: within only a week the website accesses have raised over four times, and the news is spreading all over the net!

Still in Italy or Rome to be precise, these picturesque assverts could be used to promote tourism as much as anything!

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Rome 2006

Back in New York, Gene Simmons plugged his reality show Family Jewels complete with an unapologetic justification for his assvertising campaign and a false claim to have invented the idea.

Gene Simmons has always had a firm belief in the notion that it’s not necessarily what’s up front that counts. He also counts the backs. He believes women are beautiful and the world is a better place for it. He believes women should be looked at and adored. And in light of that spirit, he has decided to unabashedly and unapologetically create the first ever “Ass”vertising campaign to launch season 2 of his hit real-life A&E series Gene Simmons Family Jewels.

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New York 2007

Gene will be joined by 25 scantily clad women at Hard Rock Cafe New York in Times Square where his model entourage – wearing underwear that reads, “Gene Simmons Family Jewels” across their rears – will be handing out branded panties to the people of NYC. After about 30 minutes at Hard Rock, Gene and his girls will make their way down to street level where they’ll walk through the busy streets to a chartered Double Decker Bus. From there, they will hit various hot spots around NYC to spread the word – and the panties.

In a related development, ass-vertising has also been appearing in movies. At least I assume that’s the thinking behind these derriere-enhanced product placements featuring Michelle Trachtenberg in Eurotrip and Mary Elizabeth Winstead as the cheerleader in Tarantino’s Death Proof.

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Finally, to announce to the world it will cease to charge booking fees, online travel agency Zuji Australia has chosen to spread the message using a classic combination of blonde models and white panties.

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Ass-tounding Ass-tralians! Sydney, September 2009

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5 thoughts on “Ass-vertising”

  1. Clearly the next frontier for ass-vertising is “spanked-in” logos or other artwork. Of course they’d need to be refreshed on a daily basis, but think of the attention they would grab!

  2. Hi Dave, good to hear you liked this topic. Are large-bottomed models in demand for the extra “assvertising space”? 🙂

    Actually Karl, what you’re describing is technically known as Spank-vertising,

    (although PER-vertising would be a better pun!)

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