It Wasn’t Acceptable in the Eighties

The 1980s wasn’t a very productive period for mainstream spanking. This was the decade when political correctness was at it’s height, and, with no internet to help, you had to look very hard indeed to find anything very exciting.

There were some notable exceptions, especially if you were into caning rather than spanking. The Happy Valley and Frank and I both contained multiple caning scenes. Lady Jane was made in this period too, whilst in Europe Serie Rose provided some scenes which are only now being widely viewed via the net.

But these all have one thing in common. They are period or costume dramas – none of them are contemporary.

Where were the spankings of women wearing the distinctive clothes and hairstyles of the period?

Soap operas such as Dallas and Dynasty teased, but never delivered.

In music, Madonna was at her most provocative, but her song Hanky Panky was not released until 1990. And in any case she was only singing about it, we never saw her actually getting it.

Whilst a certain royal princess should perhaps no longer be mentioned in this context, she inspired plenty of highly spankable clones all with her shy downcast eyes and trademark hairstyle. In the UK, newsreader Selina Scott was one of the most high profile examples.

In the U.S., there was the sit-com Cheers, about which I received an e-mail recently. You probably recall that it featured Shelley Long as the character Diane Chambers.

My e-mailer wrote:

Anyone, and I mean anyone, who ever saw the great episodes of Cheers when Shelley Long was the barmaid must have come to the conclusion that she was in for a spanking.

Obnoxious, pretentious but painfully cute she should have been across barkeeper Sam Malone’s knees more than once.

shelley long0030

In one episode she and Malone plays ping-pong and – she cheats. When he doesn’t want to play anymore she promises not to cheat, but does it right away. As he growls with anger and comes after her, she runs away and when the credits start rolling we hear a loud smack, she shrieks and he says:

– That’s why they call them paddles.

What a shame it happened off camera.

What a shame indeed. But not surprising. This was the Eighties: The-Decade-That-Spanking-Forgot.

Or did it?

We shall see, because I’ve decided to make this “Eighties Week” on The Spank Statement. I’ve got a few treats lined up, including a special edition of “Celebrities Who Want To Be Spanking Models”, a recognisably Eighties bare bottom spanking film clip, and more.

It should be mullet-tastic, so stay tuned.

6 thoughts on “It Wasn’t Acceptable in the Eighties”

  1. If I’m not mistaken, the eighties was also the decade that gave us Nu-West and Shadowlane, although their distribution may have been pretty limited at the time.

  2. Hi Valdor I totally agree with you about the eighties in this context. Back in the UK, somewhere I have a newspaper article which relates indirectly to that certain princess. When I return next week from my golfing break I’ll find it and the relevant paragraphs and see what you and your readers think.

  3. Karl: Although I was really talking about mainstream spanking, I have to say that some of the Nu West pictures that I have seen on the internet have a ‘period charm’ which stems from their use of realistic, contemporary settings and clothing.

    Most British porn of the period seemed to be so uniform (usually schoolgirl) fixated that the fashions and styles of the time hardly got a look in.

    Sir Vice Anglais: I look forward to seeing the article, just as soon as you get out of that bunker!.
    (Golf? Now that’s what I call a perversion 🙂

    Prefectdt: Thanks for dropping by, and keep reading.

  4. I’m back from my golfing trip and have eventually found the article I refered to last week. It’s a kiss n’tell story from the News of the World issue dated 19 September 1999. The story is about an affair an American woman – Jill Everett had with James Hewitt the infamous lover of Princess Diana.

    The following I quote verbatim from the first three paragraphs of the story.

    Royal love-rat James Hewitt slipped his hand into a kinky, custom-made rabbit-fur glove for an outlandish sex game. Nearby, waiting its turn, was a tub of slowly melting blackcurrant sorbet.

    “It was a single glove which he had specially designed for him” said beautiful film producer Jill Everett

    “He’d spank me very hard and then as my bottom was red, he would use the glove to tickle my skin and pat it better. It was an incredible feeling.

    This story goes on for two pages and, quite frankly, apart from the spanking references is quite tedious. Although Miss Everett does go on to illustrate Hewitt’s “debauchery” by saying he ordered her to leave her panties at home, urged her to join in threesomes with a girlfriend and spreadeagled her on his bed then lashed her arms and legs to the bedposts with her own stockings. Now to me and probably you and most of your readers this sounds like a perfectly normal sex life but it takes all sorts to make a world.

    My point though is this. James Hewitt is obviously one of us in his enjoyment of spanking female bottoms. So much so that he even has a special spanking glove made for him so that he and his partners can gain extra pleasure from this kink. Given this, I find it inconceivable that the Royal Bottom was not spanked during the years that Hewitt and Diana were lovers.

    I look forward to you and your readers comments and any other gossip about spanking in the Royal Family. I believe Prince Philip is quite keen on the subject!

  5. I have a vague recollection of this coming out at the time, but thanks for reminding us and providing the full quotes.

    Isn’t a glove the spanko equivalent of a condom? Less feeling and sensitivity, I would have thought, rather than more – but each to his own.

    My favourite Diana memory was when she was at Ascot once, and coquettishly sat on the bonnet of a car.

    When Charles saw her, he ticked her off, and she meekly removed the royal bottom from the car and looked suitably bashful and chastened.

    A right royal telling off in public makes you wonder what might have gone on in private?

    As for Primce Philip, I’m sure he must have got itchy palms every time Diana came anywhere near him!

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